You Must Love Me
by delovlies
Summary: Lily of Gondor dreams of marrying the man she loves, yet being betrothed to a man she hardly knows is not romantic. Rated T.
1. Where do we go from here?

**Well, just warning you, I'm not exactly the most frequent updater, but I promise I will finish this story! **

**Summary: Lily of Gondor is engaged to marry a man she doesn't love. **

**I don't own anything but my OC's everything else belongs to Tolkien! **

_Minas Tirith, 1314_

Lily rolled over and pulled the blanket over her head. She had no intention of getting out of bed so soon. She had gone to bed late after last night's wedding festivities. Her best friend, Lea, had married Beregond, a guard of the citadel. Her head hurt from the lack of sleep, but she knew she had no choice but to get up. In fact, this was probably the most important day of her life. Ever since her fourteenth birthday a few weeks ago, her parents had been discussing her marriage. The most likely candidate was the elder son of the Steward, Boromir. Lily had no intention of marrying a man twice her age, yet everyone except herself seemed to like the idea. Lily hurried to get up, although she had no desire to do so. Her parent's own marriage had been arranged, yet they still acted like total strangers toward each other. Lily knew they were lucky to live in the fifth citadel of Minas Tirith, yet it also meant she was rich. Lea lived nearby, yet she had chosen her own husband, even though he was a widower. His first wife had died four year ago in childbirth, leaving a little boy. Lily had meet Lea's stepson, a little boy called Bergil. She had always dreamed of romance, but to marry a man she didn't love was not her idea of such.

She hurried to dress herself in the dress specially made for this occasion. She knew ice blue was one of her better colors, though she didn't like the dress. She wouldn't call herself pretty, maybe handsome in her features, but that was all. Lea was pretty and enchanting. Her hair was blond like the maiden of the Rohirrim, but Lily had dark hair like hundreds of other girls.

A little later, Lily stepped out of the carriage and started towards the High Court, the home of the steward. She followed her parents, Atana, her mother, who was looking worried; and her father Eriador, who looked smug. Lily's legs and hands shook, and her heart pounded. When they were lead inside, she saw the Steward and Lord Boromir, before she remembered to lower her eyes. "My lords, may I present my daughter, Lilith." Her father said. _It's Lily. _She longed to say, but could not open her mouth to speak. Instead she nodded and smiled. She knew Boromir was a warrior, but he looked kind enough…Lily told herself she couldn't marry him unless she loved him, even he was quite dashing.

Boromir, on the other hand, thought she was quite pretty. She had high, elegant check bones and carried herself confidently. Her dark hair framed her face becomingly,

but her dark eyes flashed angrily when she looked up at him. They were framed with thick, dark lashes. And he thought her beautiful.


	2. This isn't where we intended to be

**Transition chapter that is rather short and vague. Please review!**

**All rights go to the Tolkien Family! Cookies if you tell me where I got my title from!**

Lily recalled that day in September when she had first met Boromir. That was almost two years ago. Now it was fall again, but much had changed. Her mother had died a year and a half ago. Her father had become cold and stern towards her; anxiously waiting for his daughter to be married so he could find the Steward's favor. Lily dreaded her wedding night more that the actual wedding. Without her mother, she had no one to prepare her for it.

She could remember the Steward's questions on that day. How old was she? Was her health good? Was she obstinate and impendent? The answer to that question was yes, but not to the Steward's hearing. He had turned and asked her mother some more…feminine questions, sounding slightly embarrassed. Lily had felt her cheeks burning and a quick glace at Boromir confirmed that his were too.

Now Lea was pregnant with Beregond's child, and Lily felt more alone than ever. In the past, their friendship had not changed despite Lea's marriage, only they had less time together. Bergil was delighted with his stepmother and her friend.

Lily knew she should be leaving. She was living in the High Court for two weeks before her wedding. She was frantic with worry by now. She didn't want to marry a man she hardly knew.


	3. We had it all,

**Here's chapter three! I know it took way too long to update but I had really really bad writer's block! I had trouble with the beginning of the story-most especially this one!- but I know what is going to happen now, so I should be more frequent. Just to clarify, her full name is Lilith, but Lily is like a friend/family nickname. You might want to go back and read chapter 2, since I revised it. Review! _Italics are thoughts. _**

**Oh- and if you know where I got the title- magic cookies for you! I own nothing! **

_**Minas Tirith 1314 **_

Lily followed her father out of the carriage. She made an effort to still her shaking hands, but that was probably impossible. She could see Boromir and his brother standing nearby, but only what she could see up through her eyelashes. _She's shaking. _ Boromir realized as his fiancée stepped out of the carriage. She was even prettier than the last time he had seen her, almost two years ago. He stood stupidly looking for a moment looking at her before Faramir nudged him from behind.

"Err- welcome, my Lady, to Minas Tirith- err, well to the High Court." He stumbled over his words in his nervousness. _Idiot! She has lived in Minas Tirith all her life! _ She glanced at him and a hint of a nervous smile crossed her face. Lily was startled at Boromir's mistake. _Is he a nervous as I am? _She asked herself. Boromir's face was coloring. He turned and offered his arm to her as they went into the Steward's hall, her father and Faramir following behind. Boromir bent his dark head to her own.

Lady Lilith, I don't agree with arranged marriages. Sadly, my father does and we must become victims of loveless unions. Let us at least be friends." He whispered. Lily looked up at him, a completely innocent and surprised look on her face. She recovered herself in half a second.

"I would like that, Lord Boromir." She said, her face showing her gratitude.

"Ahh, my son brings the girl at last." Denethor interrupted their whispered conversation. Lily flushed with anger at his rude terminology of calling her 'the girl'. Her father bowed before the Steward.

"And does my daughter please the Steward?" He asked. There was silence in the room as Denethor looked Lily up and down.

"Yes, but does she please my son?" _Enough with the weird diplomatic conversation! _Lily thought to herself. Boromir nodded.

**Sorry it's so short, but it's all the writer's block allows! Besides, my philosophy is shorter chapters, but more updates. Like? Hate? Love? Tell me! All the reviews before were soo nice! Thanks! **


	4. You believed in me, I believed in you

**See? I told you I would update soon! _Evita _comes on Broadway in March! Eeee! Please review-they make me update faster!**

**I own nothing! (ya think?) Italics are thoughts. **

Lily sat across from Boromir, listening as their father's made conversation over dinner. Denethor was very pleased at her actions. Boromor glanced across the table between bites. Her dark purple dress made her eyes appear black under their think curtain of lashes. Her milky white skin set off the hair curling delicately around her face. Her face was chiseled perfectly. To her future husband, she was a goddess. She remained nearly silent, only speaking when spoken to. She was very obedient. Denethor broke off his conversation and addressed his future daughter-in-law.

"Lady Lilith, I think once you are married, you can carry my son's child, as soon as possible." He said, causing Faramir to choke, earning him a glare from his father. Lily glanced swiftly at Boromir, who looked down, looked anywhere but at her.

"I'm only sixteen." She stated, her voice squeaking a little, but nonetheless staring straight at the Steward. "I do not wish to have a baby so early." _I do not wish to have a baby at all. Ever. Not with someone I don't love. _She nearly said that, but managed to silence her thoughts. He was not pleased. He had expected this girl to be obedient and do as she was told. That meant she would sleep with Boromir and have his child. He narrowed his eyes at her and glared. To his surprise, instead of lowering her eyes and mumbling an apology, she glared back at him haughtily. Boromir hid a smile. She had spunk all right. It was rare for anyone to defy his father like that. He took his fiancée's side immediately. It would do no one any good to have a baby before they even knew each other well.

"Excuse me, but I think it would be best if I retired early. Goodnight." With that, Lily swept out of the room, without waiting for the Steward's approval. She had been shown her room earlier. It was bigger than her room at home, but small compared to some of the rooms here. Two serving girls had helped her dress earlier, but she had dismissed them. Never in her life had she needed help dressing. She flopped unto her bed now, wishing she could talk to Lea. It seemed ages since they had seen each other, even though it had only been a few days. _I was just adjusting to the whole idea of marrying Boromir, but now he's talking about children! I was hoping that children could come in a few years at least! If ever…_

Lily was contemplating talking to Boromir about it. The look on his face earlier had shown they shared their feelings about children. Not for the first time, and certainly not the last, she wished Denethor and her own father wouldn't interfere in her life so much. It was bad enough to have to consummate an arranged marriage, but to bring it up at the dinner table! Faramir's beet red face had confirmed that. _I have to ggrow to love him, but I don't want to love him. Always as a little girl, I wanted to be married to a handsome prince with a white horse and a big palace. One who would love me no matter what I said. One who would sweep me off my feet. Someone to grow old with…_

Thinking of what could never be wasn't helping. Boromir was right. They were victims in a cruel practice. 

**Not sure if they have gods/goddess in Middle Earth (ya know, like Zeus, Athena, Neptune…) but anyway…**

**Review! **


	5. Certainties disappered,

**Yay! Chapter 5 is here at long last. I have a lot of this story planned out, but I was thinking that I should shorten the time frame. And I need some sort of a happy ending…ya know since Boromir dies… any suggestions? **

**I own nothing! _Italics are thoughts._**

Alone. Lily felt utterly alone, more than she had ever felt before. She was stuck in the High Court with her future family, and her father had left. Not until the wedding would she see him again, but after that, she could only guess. After breakfast, Boromir had walked her back to her room and told her she was welcome to leave if she wanted to get out for a while. The only person she could think of to talk to was Lea. But would it be right to dump all her woes on her friend? Maybe not, but it would be nice to talk to someone. A few minutes later, when she walked into Lea's house and was greeted warmly, she knew she had made the right decision.

"Lily, it's so good to see you! You have to tell me everything! Do you like him, is he nice?" Lea bombarded her with questions as soon as she was in the door. Lea addressed Bergil, "Darling, can you leave us alone for a little while? I want to talk to Lily." The little boy grinned and hurried outside.

"How old is he now?" Lily asked after hugging her friend.

"He's six, which I can't quite believe! Now get this!" Lea placed her hand on her round stomach. "I think I'm carrying twins!"

"Twins? Did you tell Beregond?" Lily asked.

"Of course I told him! But now you have to tell me everything!" She reminded Lily of her little-girl self for a moment.

"Oh Lea, it's awful! Well, not Boromir, he's actually very nice. But last night, at dinner, Denethor brought up children! In front of Faramir and my father and everything!" She said everything in one breath. A little sob, completely unwanted, burst from her throat as she continued. "Denethor said that he wanted me to carry a child as soon as possible, but I don't want to. Not with Boromir at least. For heaven's sake we don't love each other! It's ridiculous. I never wanted a marriage like that." Lea was sympathetic, but it wasn't the consolation Lily hoped for. By the time she had told Lea everything, she was completely ready to change the subject.

"Have you thought about what you are going to name you children? I mean, if there is two…" Lily trailed off awkwardly.

"If it's a girl, well, I thought something for purity or peace." Lea said dreamily.

"What about Hartanna? It means peace." Lily suggested.

"Hartanna. That's a beautiful name. Now all we have to do is think of something to go with it!

**I'm not entirely happy with this chapter, it's kind of awkward. I don't own the name Hartanna, it belongs to the series(s) _Dragons in Our Midst_ and _Oracles of Fire. _(I highly suggest it!) it doesn't mean peace, but the character Hartanna in _Dragons in Our Midst _also goes by Irene, which means peace. Weird, we got blasted, flooded, rained on and hurricane-ed by a hurricane that means peace…there is something wrong with that. **

**And now that I think about it, I don't own the names all of Lea's and Beregond's children! **


	6. What do we do, for our dream to survive?

**I'm sorry this update took so long; I was really reluctant to keep going. This one is going to be a little longer, so you will love me for that, I'm sure. **

"**_People of Europe, I send to the rainbow of Argentina!" _ Only, I'll send you words! **

**Warning: This chapter is slightly suggestive, but its like a 1% graphic. It's rated T already, so yeah. **

"**Rainbow Tour" is the best song ever! Just saying(that's what the quote above is from) **_There you are, I told you so__  
><em>_Makes no difference where she goes__  
><em>_The whole world over-just the same__  
><em>_Just listen to them call her name_  
>And who would underestimate the actress now? <strong>Not sure where exactly this fits in with this, but it sorta does. Sorry, I'll stop rambling and get on with the story. I only own Lily and Lea and that's it! Review! <strong>_**Italics are thoughts. **_

Boromir knelt beside Lily, solemnly saying his marriage vow.

"I, Boromir, son of Denethor II, swear to love and be of service to Lilith daughter of Eriador, to speak or be silent, to do and to let be, to come and to go, in need or plenty, in peace or war, in living or dying, from this hour henceforth, until death take me." His father presided over them, looking thoughtful. Next to him, Lily had her own thoughts. _I don't think it's wise to be tired on one's wedding day. _She had been late with Lea to witness the birth of her twins, a girl named Hartanna and a boy who was called Valcor. Even after, she had not been able to sleep from her many worries.

"I, Lilith daughter of Eriador, swear to love and be of service to Boromir son of Denethor, to speak or be silent, to do and to let be, to come and to go, in need or plenty, in peace or war, in living or dying, from this hour henceforth, until death take me." The last few days had been pleasurable enough. Children had not been brought up once, and she was beginning to feel comfortable with Boromir. He had gone out of his way many times to do so. He had walked with her many times, telling her of his childhood. How he was only ten when his mother died. How he had missed her for years after. How his father had only seen his accomplishments, never the person he was inside. How he always watched out for his little brother **(*) **and how he had tried in the past to protect his brother from his father's unkind words. A few times, they had begged horses and rode outside the White City. In Boromir's eyes, Lily was elegant and lovely upon a horse. He loved every moment he spent with her. He couldn't help but wonder what life would be like if they were ordinary people living in Lossarnach, if he had met and married her out of choice. _What if… _Beside him, Lily was having similar thoughts, only not about him. _I never got a chance to fall in love._

"In the eyes of the Steward and in the eyes of the people of Gondor, I pronounce you man and wife." Announced Denethor, smiling triumphantly. With his every word, Lily felt a door closing and the key being thrown away. They stood and Boromir took the arm of his wife. The Hall was silent, with everyone waiting outside. Lily's regret was that her closest friend and her late mother could not witness her. Outside, her father hugged her stiffly. Fleetingly, Lily wondered if he would come to see her often. Now that his only child was married and provided for, he had no use for her. She was happy to see Beregond, as he was a friend both to her and Boromir. He had brought Bergil, and he was the only soul there who could not see the tension. The group gathered for the wedding was small, only close friends and family members, coupled with prominent members of the city. Feasting commenced, but Lily could barely eat. She was filled with dark dread for later that night.

_Later that night-_

The thin dress slid over Lily's head. It was soft against her skin, yet her heart was beating so loud every thought, she did not notice. The two maids giggled madly and whispered. She was about to kill them out of annoyance, but there was knock at the door and a guff voice barking her name. One of the girls went to answer. With horror, Lily realized how revealing her dress was. Embarrassed, she crossed her arms over her chest. Denethor appeared in the now open door, motioning to her. She reluctantly followed him to Boromir's chamber. She was calm on the outside, but on the inside, every fiber of her being screamed for her to run or refuse to do this, or to sit down and cry or scream or _SOMETHING! _ Anything but calmly follow Denethor! He opened the door and pulled her inside.

"Get in the bed." He said, scowling. Embarrassed and awkwardly, she complied. A moment later, the door opened and Boromir came in. When he saw his father and wife, a flash of anger went over his face.

"I thought we discussed this." Sound came through gritted teeth. His father jerked his head towards Lily.

"You know what is expected of you!" was all he said before he left. Boromir turned to Lily, who was fighting back tears.

"Do you think this is necessary?" He asked, blushing slightly. Lily managed a shake of her head. Boromir knelt down and put his hand under the mattress, groping for something.

"What are you doing?" Lily asked, relief flooding her. Boromir grunted and then pulled out a small knife.

"It's for protection, until now." He knelt on the bed and held out his hand, cutting his finger slightly. It was a simple matter to squeeze a few drops of blood onto the white sheets. "That will fool my father. Good night." He lay down and put his back to Lily. Scooting to her edge of the bed, she breathed deeply. Boromir had protected her from his father. He was truly a gentleman. Worries gone, she fell gratefully into a deep sleep.

**Like? I'm happy with the length here! (I'm sure you are too!) **

**I had no idea what a Gondorian marriage vow is like, so I just took Pippin's vow of fealty(from the book) and modified it. Like I said before, The names Valcor and Hartanna belong to Bryan Davis. **

*** : was this correct grammar? "Watched out for" just seemed really weird to me. **


	7. How do we keep all our passions alive?

**CHAPTER 7! AN UNPDATE! Sorry for the wait, exams…well, suck. **

**In case you noticed, all the chapters now have names. They may not fit, because they are the lyrics to the beautiful song, "You Must Love Me" (hence the name). I forgot to mention I don't own that…or anything …but my OC's. **

Lily was awakened from her peaceful reverie of sleep by the door slamming open and her father-in-law striding in. Beside her, Boromir sat up with a start, practically growling, "Father…you said this wouldn't happen." Denethor paid no attention whatsoever to his son, he just pulled the covers back, revealing the blood from Boromir's finger. He smiled triumphantly, looking at his blushing son and daughter-in-law.

"It is so much easier when you just follow my instructions, is it not?" He asked cryptically. "Now, my son, you are needed in Osgiliath. I suggest you go as soon as possible." With that, he strode out of the room. Boromir sighed, seemingly embarrassed.

"Sorry about that. He likes to interfere in every part of my life. I had better go." He dressed quickly and left. Now actually alone, Lily blew a puff of air out of her lips and flopped back against the pillow, seething. Denethor was as rude as they come. Even though he was the Steward of Gondor, he was her demanding father-in-law. What right did he have to come and investigate to make sure that their marriage had been consummated? Not that it had, but Boromir's dagger trick had fooled him. Now there was little to do. Surely there were duties for the only Lady in the High Court? Yet, no one had informed her of them. Here she was, practically alone. She didn't love her husband and detested his father. Her own father had practically abandoned her, and her mother was dead. Her only friend was a wife and a mother of two new children. She was married to the son of the leader of one of the most powerful kingdoms in Middle-Earth, but she was on her own.

-_Later-_

Dinner with one's in-law's is always tense. Especially when one's brother-in-law is present and your father-in-law brings up subjects that should stay in the bedroom.

"Well, Lilith, Boromir, congratulations on you successful marriage. In all aspects." He added. Faramir choked. "I guess I can assume I'll have a grandchild within a year, right Lilith?" She barely glanced at him, glaring.

"If you'll excuse me, Lord Denethor, I think it would be best if I retire now. I'm feeling kind of tired." She smiled stiffly, getting up quickly, striding swiftly out of the room. Once outside, she leaned against the wall, groaning. She had barely been married a day and yet she was about to kill Denethor.

She walked quickly to her room, since she actually was tired. Before she could open the door, Denethor grabbed her arm.

"Since you are going to retire early, Lady Lilith, I'll tell you that since you are married to my son now, you don't need this chamber anymore. I had your things moved to the chamber adjacent to my son's. Sleep well." He returned her stiff smile.

Lily quickly found the chamber, but discovered that there was no bed. She was to sleep every night in the same bed with Boromir. Well, she might as well start now.

**Short, but hey, it's better than nothing! Thank you to all who reviewed/story alerted! And if you just story-alerted, I'd really like to know what you think! **

**I enabled anonymous reviews now. **


	8. As we used to do

**I have no excuse for not updating. Sorry, life has been hectic (well, I guess that's an excuse) and I want to start updating frequently. Thank you to all who reviewed/story alerted! And if you just story-alerted, I'd really like to know what you think! I enabled anonymous reviews now. Please review again! Here's chapter 8! **

**I own nothing but my oc's and **_Italics are thoughts._

** -_One month later-_**

Within a week of her marriage, Lily found herself with plenty of those duties she had wondered about. Now she was basically head of the Steward's household and staff. While she didn't actually do any work, she had to dictate what needed to be cleaned, what the menu for each week would be, when and what laundry should be done and so on. She had to "routinely observe the staff of the High Court and judge their abilities" as well. She didn't mind it at all, especially since it gave her something to do during the day.

Lily had a distinct feeling that she was a mere pawn in Denethor's game. She was mainly there to run the house and provide Boromir with an heir. Sometimes she felt like everyone was a pawn in his game.

It was still early morning a month after their marriage. Sleep had escaped her. Soon, she would be getting up and preparing for another day of the same duties. On the other side of the bed, Boromir slumbered, but she could not sleep. Worry had kept her up half of the night. After the first night, Denethor seemed pleased, thinking she was pregnant. It would be impossible to keep up the ruse now, since she had begun her monthly bleeding. Denethor would be banging down the door, wanting her to give his son a child.

She had almost managed to fall back asleep before the inevitable happened. There was a knock on the door. Boromir woke from his slumber long enough to mumble for his guest to come in. Denethor strode into the room, surveying the two. He got right to the point.

"Your maids tell me you are bleeding. You are not pregnant." He addressed her bluntly. Coloring, Lily could only nod sheepishly. Boromir glanced at her swiftly.

"Father, I realize you are just looking out for me, but I hardly think it's necessary for us to have a child now." He paused, choosing his next words carefully. "The choice is up to Lily. When she tells me that she wants a child, we will have one. Until then, the answer is no." His eyes flashed with anger as he glared at his father. Denethor turned red with anger. Without thinking, he directed a blow from his fist onto his young daughter-in-law's face. Lily cried out and fell back against the pillow. Boromir jumped to his feet, pointing to the door.

"Get out." he said calmly. Denethor narrowed his eyes, but left as quickly as he had come. He returned to the bed, gently touching Lily's shoulder. She turned to look up at him, her face streaked with tears and a small bruise forming on her cheekbone.

"I'm sorry." She whispered. "I'm such a baby. Who am I to defy your father?" she sniffed.

"I'm glad you do it. I hate to say it, but I've always been a little scared to do something he might not like. And I meant what I said to him. We don't have to have a baby until you want to." Lily glanced up at him, tears forming in her eyes again.

"I was hoping you would say that. And thank you, for understanding." She hugged him for the first time, but only briefly. Then, embarrassed, she hurried to her own room. Boromir remained. Her warm embrace left a tingly sensation on his skin. _You're falling in love with a girl who will never love you back. _

**Oooo! The plot thickens! I hope you enjoyed this! And please review! **


	9. Deep in my heart I'm concealing,

**Please don't kill me, but the next chapter takes place about a year after the last one. **

** Thank you for all the nice reviews and please review again! **

**I don't own anything except for my oc's…everything else belongs to Tolkien. **

_Minas Tirith, 1315 _

Boromir woke suddenly. He felt a gloominess descend upon him. He glanced over at Lily beside him. A full year had passed since their marriage. He was tempted to wake her up to wish her a happy anniversary, but decided against it. He had managed to push his feelings for her aside most of the time, but he knew she didn't fell anything for him. He quickly got up, knowing he would be expected in Osgiliath soon. Each day brought darkness from Mordor. The shadows grew, threatening Minas Tirith. Boromir and Faramir were at Osgiliath almost all the time now. Before he left, he glanced once more at Lily.

Instead of getting up quickly, Lily allowed herself to lounge in bed for a while. She had been married a full year, and it had been far from wonderful. Most of the time, she felt like just another maid, running the Steward's court. Boromir was kind, but she hadn't grown to love him like everyone expected. He protected her, but she often felt awkward around him. Amazingly, ever since Boromir had told his father off, nothing had been said about a baby. But she hardly ever saw him anymore. He and Faramir were always in Osgiliath. Most of the time, he wasn't even there when she woke up. Usually he was home in time for dinner, but there had been those awkward, silent dinners with Denethor. She finally got up and went to the window. Like everyone in Gondor, she could see the storm of Mordor building.

By the time dinner rolled around, Lily was worn out. It had been a long day, with a dozen new maids employed. They had been making mistakes since their employment a week ago, today's being the worse. Somehow, instead of scrubbing the floor in the Great Hall, they had managed to spill the soapy water all over the floor, leaving all the house staff to clean everything up. Lily had been on her knees half the day, moping up water and trying to keep water stains from forming on the walls.

Unfortunately, it was just her and Denethor present for dinner. Instead of a silent dinner, he made conversation.

"Lilith, you have been married to my son a year now, so when can he expect a heir?" Lily groaned inwardly.

"Perhaps in a few years." She said coldly. Denethor glared at her.

"You won't get any younger. Why wait?"

"I'm only seventeen. I still have few years."

"But, why wait? Seventeen seems old enough to me."

"That's not really your choice, Lord Denethor." The angry words were out of her throat before she could stop them.

"I think, as the Steward and your father-in-law, it is!" his eyes took on an angry gleam. A very angry gleam. One that scared Lily. She had seen him mad at her before, but never this mad. It was almost like he was drunk or something. He stood up, grabbed her by the arm and towed her to the main doorway. "Like I said, that is not your choice. So, when you come to your senses, just knock." With that, he opened the door and pushed her outside. She heard him tell the servants not to open the door or he would make them wish they had never been born.

Lily hugged herself and shivered. It wasn't winter just yet, but it sure felt like it. Gondor had experienced some extra cold weather in the last few days, tonight was not the exception. She sat by the door, out of the wind. Denethor was definitely insane. Or really drunk, or else he wouldn't have made her stay outside as if she was a naughty puppy. Shivering, she lowered her head to her knees. She wasn't going to let Denethor win. Not yet.

Boromir was glad to finally get going. It was a cold night and he was ready to go home. He and Faramir rode home in silence.

"You really like her, don't you?" Faramir broke the silence.

"Yeah, I guess I do." He admitted, grinning. "But she doesn't feel the same way about me."

"I don't blame you. She's a very nice girl. Pretty too."

"You like my wife?" Boromir joked. Faramir laughed and shook his head.

"I just can't wait to get home."

They walked into the seventh citadel, shivering. It felt like winter. Boromir was ready to go to bed immediately. It was late and it had been a long day. As they drew closer, he noticed a small heap beside the door. He wouldn't have noticed it, but the blue color caught his eye. He knew Lily had a dress in that color.

As they got closer, he noticed it was a person. A woman. He began to run.

"Lily!"

**Ooo! Cliffe! Please don't kill me!**

**I threw a little bit of the brothers in there. Hope you enjoyed! **

**Now, scroll down a bit. Notice the review button? Use it! **


	10. Things that I'm longing to say,

**I'm a nice person, so I'm updating early. No one likes cliffies anyway! Thank you to all who reviewed! Onward with the story!**

**I don't own anything but my OC's, everything else belongs to Tolkien. **

_**Italics are thoughts.**_

He reached her in record time. "Lily!" he called again, shaking her by the shoulders. There was no response. She was out cold. Faramir ran up behind him.

"Oh Valar, what happened?" he cried. Boromir didn't answer.

"Faramir, please run to the Houses of Healing and bring someone back here. Now!" Faramir scampered off. Boromir gathered Lily in his arms and banged on the door. One of the servants timidly opened it.

"Lord Boromir. Please, come out of the cold." Boromir boiled with anger.

"Why the hell is she outside?" he yelled. The servant quailed.

"Please, sir…your father, he…" Boromir pushed passed him. _I should have known! Of course he had something to do with this. Why else would Lily be outside on a cold night like this? _ Her skin was icy cold against him. Too cold.

He reached the bedroom and quickly laid her on the bed and tossed a blanket over her and yelled for one of her maids.

"Oh Valar. Lily." He rubbed her cold arms desperately. One of the serving girls peeked in.

"My Lord? Is everything alright?" She asked timidly.

"Do you know anything about healing?" he barked. She shook her head.

"Fetch the ladies maids." He ordered. Just then, Faramir and one of the healing women burst in. A look of shock crossed her face.

"My good Ioreth, can you do anything?" he begged. She placed a hand over Lily's forehead.

"How long was she outside?"

"We don't know, but I intend to find out." Ioreth let out a breath and nodded.

"I'll try to warm her up. But you won't be able to stay. You'll just get in the way." One of the maids peered in. "You there, fetch some warm water." She ordered, pushing Boromir and Faramir out the door. The door shut, and Faramir put a hand on his brother's arm.

"Try not to anything you'll regret later."

Boromir pushed open the door to the Steward's chambers and went directly to the bed chamber. He lit one of the lamps.

"Father, what the hell was my wife doing locked outside?" He yelled. Denethor blinked at him drowsily.

"Why. Was. Lily. locked. outside." he growled.

"Ahh, yes, the girl. I had little choice. She needs some obedience. She contiues to defy me at every turn. I will not have that little wrench disregarding me!" Boromir twisted his mouth into a sneer. He shook his head.

"You're crazy to have done that." He sneered.

With no fanfare, he turned on his heel and walked away.

Boromir leaned against the wall outside his room, sinking slowly downwards. He put his head in his hands. At this point, he wasn't sure if Lily would even recover.

**Okay, a little shorter than last time, but I typed myself into a rut. But please review! **

**Anyone ever seen _Timeline_? Reminds me so much of that "girl falls into middle earth" story idea. **


	11. Scared to confess what I'm feeling,

**Chapter 11! I'm at a little bit of a rut here, so I apologize if this is a really crappy chapter. **

butterflyninja935: At the risk of spoiling the story…I'll stay quiet.

Glory Bee: I know exactly how you feel. Timeline is defiantly one of the best movies ever…I don't know why no one liked it!

shadeslayerprincess111: Ha ha thanks sis! But you ate all the cookies!

**Thanks for your reviews/story alerts! And if you just story-alerted, I'd really like to know what you think! I'll stop rambling and get on with the story…**

**I don't own anything but my OC's, everything else belongs to Tolkien, bla bla…**

_**Italics are thoughts.**_

Boromir awoke to Ioreth shaking his shoulder. He glanced around. Dawn's light peeped in the window.

"My lord, your wife, she is awake." At first, Boromir wondered why someone was telling him that Lily was awake. Then he remembered. He charged into the bedroom.

"Lily!" He knelt by her side. She gave him a little smile. He took her hands in his.

"They told me you saved me. Any longer out there and I might have froze to death." She seemed paler, thinner. There were dark circles under her eyes.

"I'm glad I got there when I did. My father must not have been in his right mind." Her pretty face darkened. "Why? Why did he put you outside?" Lily looked at the blanket.

"H-he asked my why I was not pregnant yet. I told him that I-we-thought it was too early. He said I was old enough, but I got angry and told him that it was not his choice. He got really mad then, and told me it was. There was this angry gleam in his eyes. He just dragged me outside and threatened the servants so they wouldn't let me in. He seemed drunk or something." She whispered, a little tear making its way down her cheek. Boromir wiped it tenderly with one finger and then pulled her into an embrace. She stiffened. Abruptly, he pulled back.

"I'd better go. You probably need to rest." He turned to leave.

"Wait, Boromir!" she called. He turned to face her. "Thank you."

No other words were needed.

Eventually, she did recover. Within a week, everything was back to normal. Denethor had never said a word about his conduct, which caused a sore spot for both Lily and Boromir. She had a lot on her mind though.

Boromir had always been kind to her, but never before had he really exhibited any romantic feelings for her. Until now. He had seemed worried when she had been sick. Really worried. And from what her ladies had told her, he had barged in and demanded her care like a mother bear protecting her cubs.

Of course they were married, but it had been arranged. She hadn't felt anything romantic for him yet, and naturally assumed he hadn't felt anything for her. She had wondered how long he had kept those feelings hidden for her.

**Sorry, sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry! **

**I just hit a brick wall called writer's block **

**I'll try to update soon, but I'm a little stumped on what happens next! **

**My notes have this…gigantic gap…so; I'm very open to suggestions! **

**Please review! **


	12. Frightened you'll slip away

**Here ya go! Again, so sorry about the shortness of the previous chapters. **

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed! I don't own anything but my OC's, everything else belongs to Tolkien, ya know the rest…**

_**Italics are thoughts.**_

"Lily, there is something I need to tell you." Boromir spoke aloud. "No, that's not right." He glanced at the mirror in front of him, then around the empty room. Somehow, he had to tell Lily that he loved her. But nothing sounded right. Everything sounded fake. Awkward. Forced. And when exactly would he tell her anyway? And what would she say? _She's going to tell you that she doesn't feel the same way, that she's just happy being friends, even if we are supposed to fall in love…eventually. _Eventually seemed to far off.

Boromir had never had trouble with women before. Usually, they pretty much fell at his feet. But those women were different from Lily. They maybe fell for him because he was the Steward's eldest son, next in line for position of his father. Or maybe just because he was handsome. But Lily…she was just _different._ There was just something about her that attracted him to her. And he was going to tell her.

"So, are you falling for him at all?" Lily sighed. How could she ever think that Lea could understand? She had got to marry her true love after all. Of course, she was happy that Lea and Beregond were together. She longingly watched little Hartanna play contently with a doll while her brother napped. Lea had the fairy-tale ever after that she had always dreamed off.

"I'm not." She finally answered.

"You're not, but is Boromir falling for you?" Lea asked.

"That's just the problem." She admitted.

"So he is!" Lily nodded. "Finally!"

"But I don't want him to!" There, she'd said it. She didn't love him. "I know we were supposed to eventually fall in love, but there's just nothing there! I mean, Boromir is probably every other girl's dream, but…I don't know why I don't love him, I just don't!" Lea patted her arm sympathetically.

"It's because he's not the man you fell in love with on your own accord."

"Lily, can I talk to you?" Boromir came up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder. She stopped giving the housekeeper directions for the day and turned to face him.

"Excuse me, I'll be back in a minute." She told her. "Yes?" she asked Boromir.

He took her arm and guided her into the corridor.

"Lily, I really don't know how to say this, so I'm just going to say it. I-"

"You're going to tell me that you think you might be falling in love with me, are you not?" she asked. Boromir colored.

"How did you know that?" he asked his voice barely above a whisper.

"I just do. And, Boromir, I'm really flattered. I knew this was rather inevitable, but-"

"But you don't feel the same way." He finished for her. She nodded.

"Its not that I don't like you, I mean, you're a really wonderful man. I just haven't felt anything. For you." Her words felt like a death sentence to him. He shook his head.

"So there's nothing there?' he asked. She shook her head. He stepped back. "You haven't felt anything for me, sure. But you will. You will. You just haven't. Yet."

**Okay, not super long, but not short either. **

**I almost had Boromir kiss her right there, but…it would awkward-ify the circumstances even more. I hope its not going in circles too much, 'cause it kinda felt that way to me. Next chapter will have some action…I promise! **

**I didn't mean to quote Timeline there but I did it anyway. Oh, and the name of Hartanna belongs to Bryan Davis. **

**Review!**


	13. Why are you at my side?

**Before you begin the hanging, let me explain why I haven't updated in months. w/ studying for sol's, exams, the general end-of-school pileup of homework, a mess of baby goats being born, my computer almost broken and a bunch of other stuff, combined with my general lack of inspiration, I've barely had time to deal with anything but school. And I left at a horrible spot after writing myself into a brick wall, but I finally got some inspiration! Again, I'm sorry for my total lack of update and I hope I didn't loose anyone! So without further ado… I don't own anything but my OC's, everything else belongs to Tolkien, b/c if it didn't…bad things…**

**_Italics are thoughts._ **

Boromir stalked away. Never had anyone made him so angry before, not even his father. He'd never had problems with women before; usually it was him breaking hearts, not his being broken. He could have any woman he liked, except the one he wanted. Halfway down the hall, he turned back to her.

"Lily, if you want to leave, go ahead. There's no point for you to stay here anymore. This isn't working. We can get a divorce and you can go live somewhere else. I don't care." He left before he could hear her response."

Lily wanted to shout back at Boromir that she knew he did care and that she wasn't leaving anytime soon, but it was too late. The door slammed and she was alone. Alone to let herself cry. But why she was crying, she didn't know. _Divorce? Is that what I want? I didn't want to marry him in the first place. _A muffled sob escaped her throat as she sank to the floor, her head resting on her knees. _Lea was right. I don't love him, but we never got a chance to fall in love! Here we are, married for a year now and we're both acting like schoolchildren! _She gave in and let the tears fall. _I can't leave him now. That would be like abandoning him! _ She startled herself with these thoughts. Did she really love him after all? _If I care about him, I must._ Maybe. Maybe there was a little spark of love after all.

Boromir glanced over his shoulder for the hundredth time and took another gulp of ale.

"Relax friend, you'll not be looked twice at dressed as a guard." Beregond told him. Boromir looked at himself, knowing Beregond was right. In his friend's extra uniform, he definitely blended in with the crowd. He hadn't told Beregond why he was brooding and that was why he needed to drink, but he was pretty sure Beregond already knew why. Not that he would understand. The man had married the girl of his choice, who'd taken care of his motherless son for him. If only Lily could be a little more like her friend. He tried to imagine what life would be like if he had married Lily out of her own free will. Surely they'd have a child by now. And he wouldn't be spouting of stupid things like some schoolboy. Beregond poked him. "Have I lost you Boromir? You were miles away." Boromir shrugged.

"I've got a lot on my mind." He said.

"Well, you know what helps get things off your mind?" Beregond said jokingly. "Have another ale!" he laughed and ordered for the both of them. Lost in thought, Boromir didn't look up until a scantily clad girl approached their table.

"Can I help you boys?" she asked. Or purred, rather. Beregond shook his head and held his hands up. Boromir almost followed suit, but something stopped him. Perhaps it was that the ale had made him stupid. Or maybe he was trying to get back at Lily. But something made him get up and follow the girl to the second floor of the tavern. Boromir never went home that night.

Moonlight flooded the bedroom, but it wasn't the only thing keeping Lily awake. That, and the fact that Boromir wasn't snoring softly on the other side of her. She could imagine where he was. At a tavern or cathouse. Or both. _Did I bring this upon myself? _An unfaithful husband was like having some deformity, especially if your husband was the Steward of Gondor's son. If word got around, well, it was best not to think about what would happen if it did. She wasn't sure if she should be angry at herself or Boromir. Maybe she'd driven him to this. Maybe he had been so let down he'd left all sense of property behind. _Why didn't I just say I loved him? Married people are supposed to! _ Was this what always came out of arranged marriages? She fell asleep cursing arranged matches, her father and Denethor for arranging it, but mostly herself for being so stupid.

It was dawn when Boromir stumbled into his bed. Lily was curled as far away as possible from him. No doubt she'd heard him come in, drunk as he was. He was far too drunk to feel pity for his faithful friend, after Beregond had helped him home without making a scandal of himself. He was too drunk to feel remorse for being unfaithful to his wife. Unfaithful to his duty, his station, everything. But he was too drunk to care.

Lily waited until steady snores were coming from the other side of the bed to get up. She dressed quickly and made her way down to the kitchen to start the day's work. Some of the maids glanced at her occasionally and whispered among themselves. Everyone probably heard Boromir come in, after all. Feeling tears threatening, she excused herself from the kitchen to the hallway where she'd messed up her already messed-up life. She'd been told that crying never solved anything, but sometimes it did. Lost in self-pity, she never heard the door open and didn't see Denethor come in. He watched her in pity for a while until she looked up. He offered a sad smile and put a hand on her shoulder before moving on. His son, her husband, had made a fool out of himself. And when the man she'd resented so much could feel her pain, the world didn't seem quite so bleak.

**Well? Review! That's a long chapter for ya! **


	14. How can I be any use to you now?

**Thanks for the reviews guys! Thank you to all who reviewed/story alerted! And if you just favorite/story-alerted, I'd really like to know what you think! I only own my OC's, everything else belongs to Tolkien, (must you rub it in?) _Italics are thoughts. _**

_Minas Tirith, early spring of 1318_

If Lily had thought the last year had been awful, the next two weeks were hell. Somehow, the whole incident had managed to stay hushed up, but anyone who lived in the High Court knew, and word got out that way. The maids could be world-class gossipers. If Lea knew, she was polite enough to keep it to herself when Lily visited. Sometimes she wondered if the whole thing was her fault. Boromir seemed embarrassed when he was around her and seldom spoke to her. Denethor had exchanged choice words with his son the day after he'd staggered home drunk. The only thing good she had going for her was that Denethor had stopped heckling her about having a baby. She was only eighteen, but felt that she had been married for many more years. All she could do was throw herself into her work and try to get through each day without breaking down in front of the staff. Only at night could she let out all the emotion that had built during the day from all the whispers and stares. The only place she knew that she could be alone was the same hallway that all this mess had started. One side had windows that let moonlight in. She would just go there to be alone and away from Boromir. She had decided to let him bring up the subject when he was ready, not let her bring it up so she could yell at him like she dearly wanted too.

And now she debated whether she should be the sulking and angry wife or the forgiving wife. Boromir was leading a regiment of troops to Ithilien to protect the borders, and almost everyone in the city would be there to watch them parade out, Boromir in the lead. _I should go out to support him. What would it say to him if I stayed at home and sulked? _ She surprised herself at these thoughts. Caring what he thought? She was supposed to be mad at him, since being unfaithful to her wasn't exactly something that was easy to forgive. Or forget. Lily thought back to when this whole mess had started, when he'd said he had finally fallen in love with her and practically begged her to love him back. Was that still true? Did he still love her? Well, there was only one way to find out. Ask him.

Boromir swung onto his horse and set his jaw firmly. All of the other soldiers seemed happy that they were going to get fawned over by the entire city, but Boromir couldn't enjoy it. He knew he had messed up. Big time. And he had a lot of explaining to do when he finally got around to talking to Lily. The trouble was, he wasn't sure he could explain it to himself. _Why?_ It was just one simple word. And he didn't know why. It would have been easier just to let her go. Boromir wasn't even sure why Lily had stayed around after he's said they should get a divorce.

His thoughts were turbulent as they slowly rode through the city, cheered by the citizens. He was the captain of the troops, after all. Captains don't need to act like the soldiers did. They were soon in the fifth citadel, where he was expecting to see Lily if she had come. He tried to casually search the crowd for her, almost embarrassed when his heart jumped when he finally spotted her. She met his gaze, but he looked ahead almost immediately. He didn't look back.

Lea poked Lily, and nodded towards Boromir.

"He's looking at you, Lily!" she sounded like the young girl Lily remembered from years past. Boromir was indeed looking at her, and, oddly enough, she felt her heart flutter at the sight of him. But once she met his gaze, he looked away, almost as if he were ashamed to have her see him. Lea looked on in silence the whole time. "You still haven't sorted things out?" she asked. Lily could only shake her head.

"Haven't you heard the rumors?" she asked. Lea nodded slowly, as if she didn't want Lily to know that. "They messed up anything that might have been there." There was a moment of silence between the two friends before Lea pointed towards the soldiers.

"Look! There's Beregond!" she cried. Lily instantly felt jealousy creeping over her and wished that she could have married for love. Lea pointed out Beregond to little Hartanna, who she carried. "There's daddy, love." She told the little girl, who was more interested in covering her ears to keep the noise of the crowd out than her father. Her brother lay fast asleep in Lily's arms. Lily looked at Boromir again. He did look lordly up on the horse like that.

Faramir watched his brother and Lily. Boromir had been so quiet of late, and Faramir knew it much to do with being embarrassed about getting shamelessly drunk two weeks ago. He had watched the two of them together ever since, feeling sorrier for Lily. She seemed to have gotten the worse end of the deal, but she was going to suffer in silence until Boromir made things right between them. But considering that they barely spoke any more than was necessary, it didn't seem likely that that would be anytime soon.

Again Lily found herself in bed with the moonlight spilling into the room. Boromir would be in momentarily, but this was the first time in two weeks she had been there when he had gone to bed. Usually, she waited until he was asleep. But she had decided to do something about their relationship. She sat on the end of the bed, back to the doorway, when he came in.

"How could you do this to me, Boromir?" the words were out, and floated unwanted in the room. "Do you know what my life has been like for the past two weeks? Do you know what its like to work with gossipy maids who whisper about you, all while knowing that half the city will find out from their rumors?" She waited for him to speak, but he didn't. Briefly, Lily wondered if she had made a mistake bringing it up like that. She'd planned to tell him that they needed to talk, but those angry words had spilled out before she could stop herself.

"I don't. I wish I did, but I don't." Boromir finally said. Those words burned into Lily. Anger welled up inside of her. _Is he even sorry for what he's done to me?_ Fighting angry words and tears, Lily was out of the room in record time, brushing past Boromir. Somehow, her feet led her outside, to the gardens. She ignored the chilly air, and the cold stone of a bench beneath her. She couldn't even cry.

**Well, what do you think? Review! **


	15. Give Me a Chance

**I think I owe you guys an apology. I'm probably the worst and most infrequent updater ever. Thank you so much for anyone who is still reading and reviewing (hint hint), you guys have made my day over and over again! Thank you to all who reviewed/story alerted! And if you just favorite/story-alerted, I'd really like to know what you think! I only own my OC's, everything else belongs to Tolkien, _Italics are thoughts. _**

Familiar feelings of anger and frustration mixed with shame and regret. Lily stared at the ground, feeling tears slip down her cheeks. If everything could just be back to the way it was before…before when? When was her life actually her own? Even before her mother died, she had still known an unhappy marriage waited her. She clenched her fist. _If only_…if only life could be as simple as it had been when she'd been a child.

She heard the approaching footsteps, but ignored them. If Boromir was coming after her, she knew she wasn't going to be able to keep from yelling from him.

Faramir waited awkwardly for her to notice him. He knew his brother better than anyone, and he knew what Boromir needed from Lily.

"Well? What are you going to tell me?" She asked, anger lacing her voice, still not looking up.

"I—" he started before she looked up.

"Oh, Faramir, it's you." She blushed and stood up. "I'm sorry; I should probably be inside at this time of night…" she brushed past him.

"Lily, wait. I need to talk to you." She turned around and sighed.

"Are you going to tell me how to…" her voice squeaked. "…save my marriage?" she whispered so quietly he barely heard her.

"I'm going to try."

_Faramir knows Boromir better than anyone else. If anyone can help us, it's him._ She closed her eyes and breathed out.

"Alright." She sank back onto the bench. "If your going to try, then let's try." She patted the space next to her, inviting Faramir to sit. He complied, but sat as far away as possible. "Faramir, can you tell me just tell me why?" she looked away. "Why did Boromir stay out that night? It doesn't take much imagination to figure out what he did." She sighed and looked back at him, her eyes silently begging him to help her.

"My brother loses his temper easily. He doesn't like to be let down. And when he does get mad, his way to fix it is to forget. He'd rather drink it out of his mind and then forget about it."

"Then why did he…stay out? He said he loved me. Do you think he still does?" she asked, and Faramir heard what sounded a little like panic rising in her voice.

"I'd imagine he does. If he didn't, you would know. I don't why he…stayed out, as you put it."

"How would I know if he didn't love me? He doesn't talk to me, he hasn't tried to apologize."

"If I know Boromir, it's because he's embarrassed. He'd probably rather you bring it up."

"I did, and I ended up yelling at him." She admitted, looking guilty. "I asked how he could do all this to me, if he knew what I was feeling. He just said he wished he did, but it was almost sarcastic."

"Like I said, it's because he's embarrassed. It's good you yelled at him. He should be embarrassed, and someone he truly cares about should be yelling at him."

"You think he truly cares about me?" she asked, almost hopefully. Faramir nodded.

"And I think you care about him."

"I do."

"No, I mean, truly care about him. I think you love him." He blurted out. She looked startled, but caught herself quickly. "Everything you've said tonight has led me to this conclusion."

"You think I love him?" she asked incredulously. He nodded again, and then looked at him feet. It was a few moments before she spoke. "I guess I love him a little. Just a little." She whispered, more to herself to Faramir. "Should I tell him that? I mean, what should I say?" She asked. He looked her straight in the eye.  
>"I really don't know. You should tell him what all of this did to you. You could ask him everything you asked me. And tell him you love him."<p>

"A little. I'll him I love him a little." She interrupted. "You'll never know what you've done for me. What you've done for us. Boromir and me. I don't know how I can ever thank you."

"Simple. Just make things right with him. If he's happy, then I'm happy." He told her. She looked at her lap and smiled shyly. It was the first time Faramir had seen her smile.

"Thank you Faramir. Thank you so much." She kissed his cheek lightly. "Boromir is lucky to have a brother like you." She paused. "And since I'm married to him, I guess you're my brother too." Faramir felt his cheeks heat up. He took her hand and squeezed it.

"I wish you wouldn't have had to go through everything you've had to. But I'm glad you're here." He got up and left as suddenly as he'd come, leaving Lily alone. She was content to sit in the darkness, contemplating everything Faramir had said. Only when she heard footsteps again did she break her reverie. At first she'd thought Faramir had come to tell her something else, but when she looked up, it was not Faramir, but his brother.

"I have to talk to you, Lily."

**Well, there you have it. Faramir the marriage consular. I think that's a first for this site. Sorry it's kinda short, but I didn't really want to start something else yet. And sorry for the cliffie. I'll try to update soon! And thanks so much for staying with me despite the inconsistent updates! Oh, and review!**


	16. And I'll Let You See How

**Yay! Updates in less than a month! And now for the usual… Thank you to all who reviewed/story alerted! And if you just favorite/story-alerted, I'd really like to know what you think! I don't like to do this, but this song really goes with this chapter. **

"_Most girls would hate to be standing in my shoes.  
>But true love's something you don't choose.<br>For you love who you love.  
>And you go with what you feel.<em>

_There's a part of him you know is wild.  
>Maybe that's what made you love him all along." <em>

-You love who you love-

**I only own my OC's, everything else belongs to Tolkien, the song belongs to Frank Wildhorn. _Italics are thoughts. _**

"Borom—" Lily started, but he held up his hand and interrupted her.

"Just let me say this, and then you can talk. I just wish I had said this earlier. I need to tell

you how sorry I am. The only reason I haven't said this before was because I was too embarrassed to bring it up, and that was ridiculous. I wish we could go back to the way things were before…all this." She looked up at him, but he had focused his gaze on the ground, waiting for her to say something.

"Then why did you do it? That's what I want to know." She whispered softly. His shoulders sagged and he glanced up, but didn't look her in the eye.

"I wish I could tell you why, but I don't even know why I was so stupid." He looked through the dim light at Lily. Of all things, she was smiling.

"I know exactly how you feel." She admitted.

"You do?"

"You know when you told me that you'd grown to love me? And I told you that I didn't love you back, but that was stupid. I was caught up in hating what we'd both had to go through with an arranged marriage that I had convinced myself that I could never love you. I had focused everything on being cold to everyone, so I just dismissed any notion of a happy life. But that was why everything took a wrong turn. I should be the one apologizing to you." She took a deep breath and looked him in the eye, waiting for him to speak. "I'm trying to tell you it's not your fault. It's mine."

"But I made it worse. It got out of hand because of me. Then I left it alone, while we both knew that was making it worse."

"I tried to address it earlier, but just yelling at you probably wasn't a good choice either." Her voice carried a hint of laughter. "Your brother just left." She blurted out. Lily knew she should tell him that Faramir had said that he thought she loved him, but she didn't know how except just to spring it on him.

"What? Why?" he asked, incredulously.

"Its good thing he was, because he told me what I should tell you and gave me some insight."

"What kind of insight did he give you in the middle of the night?" he growled.

"You don't have to get defensive. He was trying to help us!" the moment the angry words left her mouth she regretted them. "He was telling me about you, so I could understand why you acted the way you did." Her tone switched to pleading, but she saw Boromir's eyes narrow.

"You just told me that you thought you caused our problems, Lily. And I told you I knew I had made them worse. But one thing leads to another and now you're the one making it worse." He turned to go, but Lily jumped up and grabbed him arm.

"Please, Boromir, don't leave yet. I shouldn't have said anything about you getting defensive. I'm glad you did, because it means you care more than you let on. I was trying to tell you I care about you more than I let on too." She paused to take a deep breath. "Faramir told me that he thought I loved you. He said everything I'd said to him and how I said it made think that. If I didn't care, I wouldn't be out here, begging you to listen to me." She looked at him, pleading for him to understand silently. He stared ahead, jaw clenching, not meeting her gaze.

"Goodnight, Lily." He shrugged her off and the darkness slowly swallowed his retreating form.

"So you're just going to burry it? Just ignore it? It's not going to go away, Boromir." She yelled. Boromir heard a sob, but then nothing else. He leaned against the doorway, unwilling to move, knowing she was right. He should fix everything between them, but again embarrassment was keeping him from going to her.

Lily let herself cry. How cared if Boromir heard her. She wanted him too. Everything was just going in a circle, a whirlpool that they could never get out of. She didn't how long she cried. It felt like hours, but it was probably only a few minuets. Only when she felt a hand on her upper arm did she look up, but before she could make sense of what was going on, the hand pulled her off the bench and onto the ground.

It was too dark to see the man's face, but she knew his intentions. Instinct took over and she began kicking and screaming, desperately hoping someone would hear her.

Boromir heard the screams. And something told him they were Lily's screams. He whirled around and ran back to her. He took in the scene when he reached her. Some measly scum had her pinned on the ground, trying to hold her down so he could rape her. She was fighting for all she was worth, but she wasn't going to be able to hold out much longer. Anger welled up inside him as he grabbed the back of the man's shirt and pulled him off Lily. Boromir delivered a blow to the side of his head and another to his mouth. The man held his fists up and took a jab, but Boromir stepped back. After a moment of fray, he heard Lily scream his name and then a there was a sharp prick at his throat. The man held a short dagger to his throat.

"I wouldn't move, mister. I'm known to be a bit unsteady with a knife." He growled. Boromir stopped struggling and gave the man a glare. The man pulled another knife out and held it at Boromir's chest. "You shouldn't have messed with me, mister. You'll get what you deserve, interrupting me." The knife at his neck pricked his skin as the man pushed it harder. Boromir saw a flash of white behind the man but quickly looked away, staring him in the eye. The man began to count down from ten, the knife drawing blood. "8…7…6—" At six, he suddenly crumpled to the ground; his knifes clattering to the ground. Now Lily stood in front of him, holding a hefty tree limb like a club.

"There. I hope he's dead." She whispered, tears running down her cheeks. Boromir just hugged her.

**Super action packed chapter! 1,088 words for ya. More soon! REVIEW!**


	17. Nothing Had Changed

**Like it says in the new-and-updated summary, this is part one of this story. So don't freak out if I say this is the one of the last chapters! There WILL be a resulting story, I promise. Maybe I'll even update frequently…(I'm going to try!) **

**Now that I think about it, the end of that last one was really, really crappy. But I'm going to stop apologizing for everything I've written and hope that you'll take all this the way I've written it. I can't believe I got to 50 reviews this fast. Thank you so much to those who have reviewed! If you like fluff, there's a lot coming! Here's the usual… I only own my OC's, everything else belongs to Tolkien. _Italics are thoughts. _ **

**(Remember, the chapter titles are lyrics to a song, not a description of the chapter…something will change in this chapter!)**

As Lily cried in his arms, Boromir had the urge to kiss her. He had a feeling that she wouldn't mind, but he was content just to hold her.

"He didn't hurt you, did he?" He whispered after a while. She looked at him with red eyes and shook her head, pushing him away.

"I really don't know why I'm crying, Boromir. I'm sorry, I—" She began, but broke off in the middle of her sentence. "I've been awful to you, haven't I?" She whispered. Boromir could only stare. Lily, awful?

"I don't think you're the only one. I guess I've been pretty bad too." He admitted.

"Let's just put all this behind us. I've already forgiven you. I just hope you can forgive me." She said, eyes begging.

"Can I ask you something?" Boromir looked away from her, changing the subject. She nodded.

"I could tell you were unhappy with this marriage. I knew you practically hated it, and you just told me so. I said you could just leave if you wanted, but you never did." He left the question in the air, not asking it for fear of what she would say.

"I didn't leave because, I just couldn't. That wouldn't have been right. I believed that one day this would work out." She looked at him. "And I think I was right" She added. Boromir was silent.

"Lily, you were forgiven for anything the moment I met you. I couldn't hold anything against you." He looked at the prostrate figure of the man on the ground. "But we really should do something about this scum."

"_She WHAT?" _ Boromir shuddered at his father's yell. Trying to calmly explain the events of last night to his father was getting impossible, especially when he got to the part about Lily knocking out the man.

"She saved my life, father. That man probably would have killed us both if she hadn't."

"Did she kill him?" Denethor asked.

"Unfortunately, she didn't." He answered. "Beregond put him in prison and is questioning him right now. Though, fortunately, Lily remains unhurt." Denethor was silent.

"Well done, Boromir. But if the girl saved you, then she must care for you." Denethor fixed his gaze on him eldest son, who already knew what his father's statement was silently asking. "Boromir, I am not a young man anymore. You could easily become the Steward in a few years. In that time, it would be very beneficial for you to have a son of your own."

Again, Denethor had made his little speech. For a while, Boromir was hoping that his father could just forget his plans for Boromir to have a son by the time he became the Steward. Obviously, that was not going to be the case.

"Father, this is not the time. Scouts have reported strange activity in Mordor. Sauron may be stirring up an attack on Gondor. If he does, I'll be fighting. Do you think I want to have any possible children growing up without a father? The answer is no. This isn't your decision anyway." Boromir stalked away, already knowing it was fruitless to try and persuade his father at all. At least his problems with Lily were through the worst. Fortunately, they met on common ground about the idea of children. He was pretty sure she was even warming up to him.

Faramir strode into the dining hall where Lily and Boromir were already seated. Denethor was no where to be seen.

"Where is Father, Boromir? I haven't seen him all day." He asked.

"He's off sulking somewhere." Boromir answered, a laugh creeping into his voice. Lily smiled at Boromir for a second and he grinned back, apparently thinking Faramir didn't see them. It seemed any problems between them had been talked out, and it probably helped that Boromir had rescued her. He had heard the story from Beregond, but Boromir had come and thanked him, glad of Faramir's interference.

"My father is at it again." Boromir told Lily as they walked through the gardens. She glanced at him. "He was telling me, again, about the need for me to have a son when he dies. He acts like the world will end if I don't." He tried to lighten the comment. "But like I said before, it's up to you. It still is." He assured her.

"It's very noble of you to give me freedom, Boromir. I could love you for that." She cut off quickly; surprised she'd spoken that aloud. They were silent for a moment.

"Last night you said you knew you cared about me. Did that mean you love me?" He tried not to sound too eager. "I mean, you just said—"

"I don't know. I told Faramir I loved you a little. And I care for you a lot, if that helps." She looked up at him, smiling slightly. He just couldn't resist that look.

"It helps, Lily." He grinned and put an arm her waist. They kept walking. "Lily?" he asked after a minute.

"Hmm?"

"You could do better than me, I think. You could find someone you love. Someone you actually fell in love with, I mean."

"I won't do better than you, Boromir, since you are the Steward's son." She said. "But there really isn't anyone who could love me like you do." He looked down at her, surprised she'd said something like that.

"I think I know you better than you know yourself, Lily. It's more than a little."

**Yeah, finally, a fluffy chapter! I wanted this to be longer, but I'm going on vacation soon and I wanted to give you an update before I left, so I did it a bit shorter. Hope you enjoyed this one, since it's my fave chapter yet. Please review! **


	18. You Must Love Me

**Finally, the long-awaited (sorry, I warned you! Won't make excuses) last chapter! And it only took me almost a year to crank out 18 crappy short chapters. So without further ado, I only own my OC's, everything else belongs to Tolkien. _Italics are thoughts. _ Author's note contains more on the sequel story. **

Lily watched Boromir and Faramir gallop away, headed to Osgilith. Every time she watched him ride away, she was starting to wonder if today would be the day he never came back. She flopped back on the bed, crossing her arms under her head. Ever since the evening before, she'd been confused. Again. Boromir had said she loved him. That he knew she loved him. And she was pretty sure he was right.

She blew the stray hair the fell into her eyes and shut her eyes tightly. Boromir had done nothing but love her. He'd protected and supported her every step of the way. And she had done nothing in return. Nothing but make it hard for him.

"What's got you all happy, Boromir? You're smiling off into space." Faramir's words interrupted Boromir's thoughts. He shrugged.

"She loves me." He couldn't help but grin.

"Well, congratulations, she couldn't resist you for too much longer." Faramir joked. Boromir punched him playfully. He had known, just known, that she finally loved him. He'd loved her all along, but loved her even more after all they'd been through.

Boromir, Lily and Faramir were already eating dinner when Denethor swept in. Lily felt a chill up her back. Faramir and Boromir exchanged glances. Something wasn't right. Boromir could tell his father was mad. He surveyed the three of them, stopping on Lily.

"Still no heir, Boromir?" He asked.

"Father—" He started.

"Well? Is it yes or no? Time is running out, Boromir. You can't wait around forever."

"I really don't see why it is so important, Father. Why so soon?" Boromir asked, gritting his teeth. They'd been through this many times.

"Because it's the way things are done!" Denethor yelled, on his feet. Boromir matched his tone a stature.

"The way things are done is to interfere in our lives, get in our business? That's how things are done?" He yelled back. Denethor's eyes flashed.

"It is, Boromir! You need to—"

"Not anymore, Father." Boromir interrupted. He sat back down, glaring at his father. Denethor glared back. His glare shifted to Lily. Before Boromir could react, he grabbed her arm and pulled her out of her seat. She let out a little shriek. He jumped up and grabbed Denethor's arm, pulling him back, with Faramir on the other side. Denethor shook them off, but didn't move. He uttered two chilling words.

"Get out." They didn't waste a second. Boromir leaned down to help Lily up. She seemed fine, thankfully.

Once out of the dining room, Lily sagged against the wall.

"This is my fault, Boromir." She said. He just shrugged and didn't look at her. She glanced her arm, where a bruise from Denethor's grip was already forming. Boromir followed her gaze, looking concerned.

"Let me see that." He said, reaching for her wrist.

"It's just a bruise." Lily protested, but didn't pull her arm away. She looked at Boromir. He was just…perfect. Her heart swelled with love. She didn't why she hadn't loved him all along. He looked up. "You're right. It's just a –" Before he could finish, Lily lifted her lips to his. Gondor disappeared.

When he finally pulled away, shocked was written all over her face. He was sure he looked the same way.

"Nothing could ever be your fault, Lily. I loved you from the moment I saw you. But I only love you more now. You're perfect." He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her again.

Boromir was almost asleep. He could hear Lily's soft breathing on the other side. After she'd kissed him, she had told him he couldn't have been better to her. She had said that he was right; she'd loved him all along. _ "It's just taken me this long to find it, thanks to you." _ He thought she was asleep by the time he came in their bedroom. But now he heard her stir and sit up.

"Boromir?" She whispered.

"Hmm?" He looked up at her, lit by moonlight. She leaned down to kiss him again, and then he heard her whisper through the darkness.

"I love you too."

**~The End~**

**Thanks to all of you who have read this despite the waaaay too short chapters, the choppy story line, the constant writer' block, the inconsistent updates, the random obsessions and especially thank you for all your wonderful reviews. Sequel story info in Author's Note.**


	19. Author

**Whew! Like I said, Thank you so much for everyone who took their time to read this or to review. You guys have made my day so many times. **

**I plan to write to write a sequel story; hopefully get the first chapter this week or early next week. It is called _All I Have_. I'd be happy to PM anyone who reviews this chapter when I put it up. **

**Thanks so much for reading, despite everything, especially the inconsistent updates!**


End file.
